Today it was 4 years ago that we received our referral for Faith!!!! It is very late and I'm really tired from our fantastic week-end trip, but I just have to take a moment to sit and reflect on that amazing day that happened to us exactly 4 years ago today............
We were pretty certain we would be getting "the call" on March 9th as our agency had sent out an email that a package was on it's way and they were expecting to receive referrals on that day. We were stationed in England and therefore 9 hours ahead of what the time was back in the States. Almost a full day! Our agency did tell us that when they received the referrals we would be the first they would call because of the time difference. They hoped to receive the package by around 10:00 am which would be 7:00 pm our time. That day was one of the longest days I have ever experienced!! With the time difference I just wanted the day to be over so that back in the States they could start their day!! On what should have been a happy and exciting day for me, I was very moody and snappy with everyone. I was just terrible! I remember being so short with Dale and the boys. Emotionally I was really going through my "labor pains." The waiting was all coming to an end and the day I had been dreaming of was about to happen and all we had to do was wait for "that call!" I was a total wreck! Waiting out the entire day made it so hard. Every hour seemed like a day and every minute seemed like an hour. I remember as evening time finally rolled around we had the boys get ready for bed and told them they could watch some cartoons. We told them their was a chance we would be getting a call about their new baby sister. We didn't want to disappoint them if by some chance the referrals didn't come in. I remember at 7:00 pm we tried to sit down with the boys and watch cartoons with them. I knew it was 10:00 FINALLY back in the States. I slowly watched the clock tick by wondering and waiting. At 7:30 the phone rang!!!!!! We had it planned that I would answer. I raced to the phone and I felt like I could barely get "Hello" out. As soon as I said Hello Donna from our agency said, "Colleen I'm calling to let you know that you have a daughter, a beautiful daughter, and I mean a beautiful daughter." The minute I heard those words I felt feelings I had never felt before in my life. I felt like my heart was going to explode! I was shaking and my heart was just racing! I shouted to Dale that we had a daughter!! She continued to fill me in on more information saying she looks petite, has big round eyes, fair skin and then she started describing one of the pictures of her in which she was wearing a white gown that looked like a baptism gown. She told me she had never seen a more beautiful referral photo. I remember Dale kept asking what province is she from? We had a list of questions written down to ask when the call did come, but I could barely even concentrate to ask the questions. I couldn't believe we had a daughter!!! She said Faith was from Gansu province which is northern China near Mongolia and that there are not many adoptions from that area. She went over some other details and then said that as soon as all the other families were called they would be emailing all the photos and information to us. We were one happy family!!!!! My heart just could not stop racing and I felt like no one could be more happier than I was at that moment!!
We kept checking our email for the photos and by midnight we still had not received them. I knew we would not be getting any sleep that night, but we decided to at least try. Dale fell asleep, but of course me being the anxious Mommy that I was I kept getting up every 30 minutes checking our email. At 2:00 in the morning we had the email!!!! The photos were here!! I woke Dale up so we could see our daughter for the first time together. (we decided to let the boys sleep in and that they could wait until the morning) Waiting for the photos to upload seemed to take forever. I was so excited, nervous, wondering how was I was going to feel when I looked at my daughter for the first time. As the photos appeared my hand was shaking as I scrolled down and this was the first glimpse we had of Faith.........................
"Faith is to being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Oh My Gosh!!!! I was breathless!!! You literally took my breath away!! I never saw a more beautiful baby and you were ours!!! I thought you looked just like an angel. Daddy and I just sat there staring with tears in our eyes for the longest time. We couldn't believe how beautiful and sweet you were!! I just wanted to hold you and squeeze you the moment I saw you. You are perfect!
This was the next photo we saw of you. This really made me smile because when we sent in our family photos with our adoption packet they said not to send in any photos with pets in them. Well, all of our family photos had our first Golden Retriever Sam in them. I sent them in anyway because it was who we were. Our dog was part of our family. And here you were sitting on a stuffed dog!
And this was my favorite referral photo of all of them!! You were not all dressed up and you did not have props around you. I imagined this is closely to how you dressed and looked each day. I loved how your one little hand was fisted and the other one was stretched open.
Your Mommy and Daddy were (and are!) the proudest parents in the world!!! After seeing these photos we did not sleep the rest of the night. We were much too excited! We just wanted to hop on the plane and get to you as soon as we could!
In the morning when your brothers saw you they were so excited! Reed had to have me print copies of your pictures to bring to school with him. I had to show you off to everyone!! I carried these photos around with me everywhere and made sure everyone looked at them whether they wanted to or not:)
The next few days were so surreal as we stared at your photos constantly and had to pinch ourselves that you were were ours!!! We seemed to fall more in love with you every day. My Mommy instincts kicked in and I worried constantly about you just wanting to get to you as fast I could!!
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We were pretty certain we would be getting "the call" on March 9th as our agency had sent out an email that a package was on it's way and they were expecting to receive referrals on that day. We were stationed in England and therefore 9 hours ahead of what the time was back in the States. Almost a full day! Our agency did tell us that when they received the referrals we would be the first they would call because of the time difference. They hoped to receive the package by around 10:00 am which would be 7:00 pm our time. That day was one of the longest days I have ever experienced!! With the time difference I just wanted the day to be over so that back in the States they could start their day!! On what should have been a happy and exciting day for me, I was very moody and snappy with everyone. I was just terrible! I remember being so short with Dale and the boys. Emotionally I was really going through my "labor pains." The waiting was all coming to an end and the day I had been dreaming of was about to happen and all we had to do was wait for "that call!" I was a total wreck! Waiting out the entire day made it so hard. Every hour seemed like a day and every minute seemed like an hour. I remember as evening time finally rolled around we had the boys get ready for bed and told them they could watch some cartoons. We told them their was a chance we would be getting a call about their new baby sister. We didn't want to disappoint them if by some chance the referrals didn't come in. I remember at 7:00 pm we tried to sit down with the boys and watch cartoons with them. I knew it was 10:00 FINALLY back in the States. I slowly watched the clock tick by wondering and waiting. At 7:30 the phone rang!!!!!! We had it planned that I would answer. I raced to the phone and I felt like I could barely get "Hello" out. As soon as I said Hello Donna from our agency said, "Colleen I'm calling to let you know that you have a daughter, a beautiful daughter, and I mean a beautiful daughter." The minute I heard those words I felt feelings I had never felt before in my life. I felt like my heart was going to explode! I was shaking and my heart was just racing! I shouted to Dale that we had a daughter!! She continued to fill me in on more information saying she looks petite, has big round eyes, fair skin and then she started describing one of the pictures of her in which she was wearing a white gown that looked like a baptism gown. She told me she had never seen a more beautiful referral photo. I remember Dale kept asking what province is she from? We had a list of questions written down to ask when the call did come, but I could barely even concentrate to ask the questions. I couldn't believe we had a daughter!!! She said Faith was from Gansu province which is northern China near Mongolia and that there are not many adoptions from that area. She went over some other details and then said that as soon as all the other families were called they would be emailing all the photos and information to us. We were one happy family!!!!! My heart just could not stop racing and I felt like no one could be more happier than I was at that moment!!
We kept checking our email for the photos and by midnight we still had not received them. I knew we would not be getting any sleep that night, but we decided to at least try. Dale fell asleep, but of course me being the anxious Mommy that I was I kept getting up every 30 minutes checking our email. At 2:00 in the morning we had the email!!!! The photos were here!! I woke Dale up so we could see our daughter for the first time together. (we decided to let the boys sleep in and that they could wait until the morning) Waiting for the photos to upload seemed to take forever. I was so excited, nervous, wondering how was I was going to feel when I looked at my daughter for the first time. As the photos appeared my hand was shaking as I scrolled down and this was the first glimpse we had of Faith.........................
"Faith is to being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Oh My Gosh!!!! I was breathless!!! You literally took my breath away!! I never saw a more beautiful baby and you were ours!!! I thought you looked just like an angel. Daddy and I just sat there staring with tears in our eyes for the longest time. We couldn't believe how beautiful and sweet you were!! I just wanted to hold you and squeeze you the moment I saw you. You are perfect!
This was the next photo we saw of you. This really made me smile because when we sent in our family photos with our adoption packet they said not to send in any photos with pets in them. Well, all of our family photos had our first Golden Retriever Sam in them. I sent them in anyway because it was who we were. Our dog was part of our family. And here you were sitting on a stuffed dog!
And this was my favorite referral photo of all of them!! You were not all dressed up and you did not have props around you. I imagined this is closely to how you dressed and looked each day. I loved how your one little hand was fisted and the other one was stretched open.Your Mommy and Daddy were (and are!) the proudest parents in the world!!! After seeing these photos we did not sleep the rest of the night. We were much too excited! We just wanted to hop on the plane and get to you as soon as we could!
In the morning when your brothers saw you they were so excited! Reed had to have me print copies of your pictures to bring to school with him. I had to show you off to everyone!! I carried these photos around with me everywhere and made sure everyone looked at them whether they wanted to or not:)
The next few days were so surreal as we stared at your photos constantly and had to pinch ourselves that you were were ours!!! We seemed to fall more in love with you every day. My Mommy instincts kicked in and I worried constantly about you just wanting to get to you as fast I could!!
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In honor of our Anniversary Day I wanted to attempt to get a photo of Faith holding her referral photo. As you can see my attempt did not go so well! lol! Faith was in a silly mood and just did not feel like cooperating. Looking at these photos however, they are just perfect to me!!
(I took these photos on Friday as I knew we would be going away for the week-end and it would be even more impossible to get them when we came home!:)
"Let's play peek-a-boo!"
watch me hold it with my chin!
My hair is in my mouth!
That's me!
Ohhhh, I've had enough!
Can I look down?
I won't smile!
OK I'll smile, but I'll hide it behind the picture!
I'm going to lay behind my picture!
I'll keep my eyes closed!
Yeah! You finally gave up!!!
I was reading over our travel group yahoo group posts that our agency had set up for us and it was so much fun to read those very first posts the day after receiving the big news. Here is the first post I had sent:
WE ARE SOOO HAPPY AND EXCITED!!!!!
(I took these photos on Friday as I knew we would be going away for the week-end and it would be even more impossible to get them when we came home!:)
"Let's play peek-a-boo!"
watch me hold it with my chin!
My hair is in my mouth!
That's me!
Ohhhh, I've had enough!
Can I look down?
I won't smile!
OK I'll smile, but I'll hide it behind the picture!
I'm going to lay behind my picture!
I'll keep my eyes closed!
Yeah! You finally gave up!!!I was reading over our travel group yahoo group posts that our agency had set up for us and it was so much fun to read those very first posts the day after receiving the big news. Here is the first post I had sent:
WE ARE SOOO HAPPY AND EXCITED!!!!!
Oh my gosh!!!! I can't believe what a wonderful feeling this is to be posting on our travel group! We are totally exhausted from a sleepless night last night here in the UK. Our call came at 7:30pm. uk time and we didn't get the photos until after midnight! All we could do all night was stare at our beautiful baby! We are so in love. Look so forward to getting to know everyone and plan our travels. We are first timers for travelling to China so we have LOTS to learn from all of you that have done this before. We are still taking all of this excitement all in!! I don't think my heart has stopped pounding. Our babies share such a special bond!!! I can't wait to see them all together! Do you know if we can send a small package to the orphanage? Would love to send a throw away camera and maybe some photos and small blanket. You guys try to get some rest tonight and CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! Colleen, Dale, Dean and Reed Miller Proud family to Faith Anna Xia!!!!!!!!!! I am some times asked why did you adopt? For me I always wanted to adopt for as long as I can remember....even long before I was married the seed of adoption was planted in my heart. It just always seemed like such a natural process. I mean what can be more natural than someone wanting a child to love and there being a child that needs someone to love them. After the birth of our second son I knew I no longer wanted to add to our family through pregnancy as my heart longed to add to our family through adoption. There were many twists of faith as we researched adoption and decided what country and what agency to use. All of these obstacles and the mounds of paper work and painful waiting were all just the perfect timing of knowing that Faith was meant to be our daughter. I have no doubts that she was meant to be ours. I can't believe it was 4 years ago this most amazing day happened!! I remember it all so clearly yet I cannot remember now what life was like without you in it. My heart was changed forever that day we received the call! You are our miracle that has completed our lives and filled a place in my heart I didn't realize was so empty. I am so honored, privileged, and proud to be your Mommy. I love you with all of my heart and soul!!!!!!!! Happy 4th Anniversary Referral Day!!!!! |
4 comments:
HAPPY REFERRAL DAY!!! What a beautiful post ~ love the pic's of Faith with her photo :) I have NEVER seen such a gorgeous referral photo!!!
Happy Referral Day~ what a beautifully written post. Faith was just precious and so sweet as a baby and now still so sweet and lovely and funny! :)
Happy first time you saw your daughter's precious face day....
Thank you for visiting my blog and I can't wait for you to send pictures for our China blog.
Your daughter is just beautiful and your post touched my heart... each time I hear or read of someone else's experience my heart cries out with joy for them because I truly understand. And it always blesses me because it takes me back to my special day too.
God Bless you... you have such beautiful quotes.... may we use some of them on the China blog?
Have a blessed night.
Daleea
Oh boy does that post bring back memories! I remember that LONG wait for the phone call very well. (Silly me went to work that day. Bad idea!) Faith's referral picture is beautiful, and what a wonderful post!
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