Faith's Lifebook~

I HAVE to finish Faith's life book!

I started it almost a year ago and have been pondering over it these last few months on exactly what I want to put in it and how much she is ready to hear at her age right now. My intention was to keep it simple, but now as she is getting older I am beginning to feel maybe it is time to share more with her. We have not talked at all yet about her being left, her finding place or the letter that was left with her. I am struggling with whether or not to include these things in her life book and if I do just how to put it all in words. Is she ready for it all?


Last Sunday I took Faith to a childrens Chinese Mandarin language class they are offering near by. There are no other adoptive families attending only families that are Chinese and speak the language in the home. I knew it would be advanced, but I asked if we could sit in on the class to see what it was all about and to see how Faith might do in it. When we walked in I just knew it was going to be much more advanced then I even expected. The children (ages 4-about 11 years old) were all sitting around a table while the teacher spoke to them in only Mandarin. The children were also writing in Chinese. I was a bit uncomfortable not knowing how Faith would react to it all, but Faith never seizes to amaze me. She walked confidently in the room sat right down and was eager to learn. She tried to join in as much as she could and she cheered everyone on as they spoke their answers in Chinese. I pulled up a chair to sit behind her and she would occasionally look back at me smile and blow me a kiss as if she was saying, "everything's OK Mom."
I was so very proud of her and I have to admit I was a bit emotional watching her and wondering what was going through her head. It was a 2 hour class so a little long...she was antsy towards the end. But when it was over she told me "I liked the class Mom." "I want to go back next Sunday." (I'm not sure what we will do yet. It is very advanced for her and Sunday is such a family day for us that we always seem to be so busy on that day. However, they would like to start a very beginner class if they can get enough response. We will see)


She did say some things to me after the class that got me wondering if it stirred some questions in her mind. Faith has never seemed too interested to talk about her life as a baby in China. I read her adoption and forever family books to her quite often and she just listens and never really asks questions. Well, after class she said to me "I didn't see things when I was a baby." I wasn't sure what she meant by this so I asked her "What do you mean sweetie you didn't see things?" She said "Well, I didn't see YOU when I was a baby." Now, as an adoptive Mom I do have to say that I seem to analyze everything Faith does and says far too much. She may have simply been meaning I don't remember when I was a baby. Then again I thought she may be trying to ask some questions. I explained to her that it is hard to remember things that happened to us when we are babies or very young and that our memories come from photos, memory books, and by talking about them with our family. I then told her story again about being a baby in China and living there until we came to bring her home. She then says to me "Will you make me a book so I can see it." Ohhh, when she said that I realized I HAVE to get her life book finished for her. She is at an age where it is so important for her to know where her life began. She has all her baby photos from us being in China to bring her home and we watch her China dvd all the time, but what about how her life began. Maybe it is time to share more with her. I just want to make sure I say the right things and not share anything she may not be ready for.
I am having her life book pages digitally scrap booked by someone. (I am just learning this and if I did it she would be 18 by the time it was finished:) Here is a sample of the first page. I may change the photo. This one was taken a couple years ago. I can't decide if I want a recent photo or one of her as a baby on the first page? Any suggestions? I also want to involve her in a few of the pages as I feel this will mean a lot to her. I found this web site here about Lifebooks
that is very useful.
(I usually do not share anything too personal about Faith as I feel the need to keep things private for her. However there are some things I would like to share in hopes it might be helpful to others or because of advice or suggestions others might have. As I complete her lifebook I will share some of the pages on her blog)